Wednesday, December 13, 2006
im so fuckstrated now
urgh
and im super pissed off with hnz till i have no mood to bloggggggggg
bleh i realised i've been very cranky lately
not enough sleep i think
man, i wanna talk to hnz
ok im off now
bye ppl
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5:31 AM
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Yest went to aisyah's surprise party! Haha. it was super funny la. But it was a short and sweet one x) but yea, still feel bad bout the phone thingy. We were walking in the wading pool and she dropped her new phone in the pool, which she just bought like a few weeks ago? Pity the bday gal. then ya, the phone got spoilt and stuff. =( anyways went home tgt with the rest and told sum bout the thingy.
It makes me sad when I read the messages she sent. I mean, its kinda obvious she still loves her ex a lot lot lot and miss her. X( and how worse can it get, when you don't even know where in the world that person is now, or how she's doing. I dunno why but I think her ex might have said smth like, I cant have my own life with you or smth. Sighsigh. I can only turn to my comp to relent bout this. She doesn't deserve to get sad over that woman, that's what I thought. But yea, since she still loves her I thought I should help and I told sum bout this. Well, that sweet darling's helping out too. x) so, we have 10 weeks (valentine's day) to find out bout that woman, find her and fix everything. Its hard and sounds crazy, since we know nothing bout her, okay, maybe just that she likes strawberry shortcake =// or we can extend it to 15 weeks (hnz's bday). So we're gonna start out now! But.. I dunno where to start x/ ahh hnz's sucha sweet lil thang x)) but she makes this job harder cause when I asked her if she needs any help she said she don't need any help and there's nth left we can do. Aiyoh. "my goal is your happiness!" =D
So anyways, sorta looking forward to next yr, the whole new life and stuff. Its gonna be scary but yea. Revathy seems to be looking forward to it though. hah, since she got all excited bout being in the same class and stuff. Hah. Ooh and got these nice thingys from the book I was reading, 'girl's poker night'. Read it, its niceeeeeee
' "life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage" I think she was right (Anais Nin) –happy endings are not for cowards. ' so true man. Hnz should be reading this.
'I don't reveal the things I hold closest and fear losing the most. I work overtime keeping them veiled and camouflaged.' Truetrue.
'you don't need to know that I run away from my problems. I pack up and move. I get out before I care too much, before I risk too much.' Woah. Sounds so much like me huh.
'you don't need to know that when someone confides in me, I feel needed. Unless I don't like what I'm being told. Then I give up on you. No matter how you might have changed. No matter how repentant you are. No matter how much loss you feel. No matter how much like me you are. Because I don't stick around long enough to listen to what needs to be said. What I need is something to hold against you. BECAUSE IF I DON'T HAVE THAT, I WILL BE CRUSHED WHEN YOU GO AWAY.' The last line is so damn true.
'you don't know need to know that I kept that stupid note in the pocket of my backpack for a month. And every so often I'd take it out and look at it and study the way you wrote my name. To see if it meant something. To see if there were clues about us.' Scary how its so similar to me, just that mine are letters and its not only a month, its more than half a year.
'you don't need to know that I'm telling myself to stay when I feel like leaving. Because leaving is easy and staying takes work. But in the midst of the work, I might lose some of my fear.' I like this is x)
'when you run into love and it seems like some psychedelic mystery, look at it again, and again, and keep looking at it until you realize the only mystery is how you've gotten by so long without it.' I like this one the best!! xD
Ok that's it x) im not gonna waste time anymore and go on my MISSION now! Haha. tata!~
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10:45 PM
Church;